The Beauty and the Beast

Have you ever felt like you have a war being waged inside your body? Maybe a fuzzy brain some days when you just can’t remember why you walked into a room or dialed a friend? Have you ever felt icy cold and blazing hot at the same time? Do you ever feel like the bathroom scale takes two steps back and three steps forward? Have you ever been so irritable that if you could get away from yourself, you would? Welcome to menopause!

I had a partial hysterectomy in 1999, and it took about a year for me to start having out of body experiences. At first, they were quite subtle. Unusually irritated by other drivers. A writing campaign to the producers of the movie “Message in a Bottle” because Kevin Costner died at the end. I noticed that I was complaining about how warm it was in movie theaters, said no woman ever! Concentration becoming so difficult that it seemed like staticky elevator music in the back of my head.

Then, every little thing annoyed me. I got to the point that I was annoyed at always being annoyed! So, you can imagine how my husband felt. We were in business together at the time this lovely journey began. He tried to be very patient and always had helpful hints at how I could combat such behaviors (she says sarcastically!). He did not quite understand what was going on and longed for the day to have back the woman God gave him so many years before.

I went to doctors, nutritionists and pastors seeking guidance. I spoke with other women who had already gone through this exciting period of time and the best advice they gave me was…just live through it. I prayed that God would give me the wisdom He talks about the older women having because I thought that might be a perk to all this ugliness. My husband told me that maybe I wasn’t old enough (I was 39) to get the wisdom God speaks of. Maybe I had to work a little harder at the “living through it” part, then I would be old enough for wisdom.

Well, have heart fellow menopausal women! It does get better with age, or maybe your brain just gets fuzzier so that you don’t remember so much about it. As far as the “wisdom” thing goes, I must have gained some wisdom because I have decided “living through it” isn’t so bad. 

By Pat Schwieder